The Primetime Dish

I finally caught up with the last two episodes of “Flash Gordon.” The show is slowly getting better and a little more interesting. However there are now rumors that the show might actually be cancelled due to the poor ratings and bad reviews.

The Assassin episode was somewhat confusing. Ming and his weird scientist guy Rylo sent an assassin to earth who could adapt and take on the shape of anyone else by using a machine to basically suck out their brains. He was sent to blow up the old offices of people tied to Flash’s father, perhaps they were trying to stop Flash from getting close to the truth? I don’t know, it was a confusing episode and one which probably should have been dropped. It didn’t seem to advance the story at all.

Vultan? I hardly recognize you!

In Ascension we met the Hawkmen, though once again the show took huge liberties. King Vultan was now Chief Vultan, who for thirteen years has been searching for his son. His son was lost through a rift around the same time Flash’s father was. Vultan’s son was on Earth, he was eventually located. He was initiated into the Hawkmen tribe, they’re now called Dactyls as opposed to Hawkmen. Furthermore they don’t have wings, they don’t even fly. They worship the hawk, are nomads and basically glide on the wind using their capes. Aside from the disappointment of what they did to the Hawkmen, it was actually one of the better episode. Flash helped Vultan save his son, who was captured by Aurora as she wanted a port key from Vultan. Vultan and his men stole it from her to get to earth and find Vultan’s son, while Aurora had stolen it from Rylo for some other reason. In the end Vultan’s son however returned back to Earth, but claimed he finally knew who he was and where he came from. Vultan told him he was welcomed in their tribe anytime. Flash and Aurora’s relationship meanwhile continues to be strained because he doesn’t trust her, and he thought she was different from her father.

I can’t wait to see what they’ve done to Baron and his tribe :-\ Though if the rumors are true, the show may be canceled before then!

I finally got myself caught up on “Flash Gordon.” Well I was only a little behind, but it’s one of these shows I’ve been pondering about before I blog about.

Episode 2 surrounded the character of Baylin having to deal with her “bond mate” (ie arranged spouse) coming through the rift to earth to get her back. Meanwhile Aurora began to see Ming as the tyrant he is when he executed an ice smuggler, who was only trying to make money to cure his sick daughter. This episode BORED me to tears.

Episode 3 was about a disease injected into Flash’s friend and partner. Flash and Baylin went to Mongo for the cure, while Dale and Zarkoff had to keep him alive. The key to doing this was making him feel miserable, which Dale did a good job of. They were attending a wedding. This episode was actually a lot better. Actually I think it was probably the best one so far, it was funny yet exciting.

I think overall my issue with the whole show is that it’s not Flash Gordon. At least it’s not the Flash most of us know. I can’t fault them for trying to spruce the story up, but I can fault them for basically completely reinventing it and just keeping the character names. If this show was called anything else, and they changed all the Flash based character’s names, I bet I wouldn’t have such issues with it.

So tonight Sci Fi premiered their new show “Flash Gordon.” I watched it. My thoughts? I’m torn honestly. I realize it was the pilot, which means a lot of storyline and character introductions, but it was just slow. Let me do a quick recap for those who didn’t watch first.

Ming, Dale and Flash. Photo property of SciFi.com

Steve “Flash” Gordon is a home town hero, a three time marathon winner. His father “died” at a young age, he was the good son who stayed home with his cancer stricken mother to take care of her, apparently forsaking his own career/goals in the process. High school sweet heart Dale Evans goes off to Yale, lands a job as a reporter and returns home to interview Flash upon his third marathon win. Dale is of course engaged to a cop. However she seems still in love with Flash. Big shock.

Flash soon finds he’s being stalked by a mystery man (ie geek) in an RV. Enter Hans Zarkoff. He knew Flash’s dad, who was a physicist who supposedly “died” in a freak accident/fire. He warns Flash should he see his dad, trust no one. Meanwhile Dale the reporter begins investigating odd stories about “aliens” invading earth. She thinks they are fakes, until the cop boyfriend lets her know this alien has now killed a person.

Flash goes to Dale, convinced these are all tied together. As it turns out, daddy was working for a project involving dimensional rifts for NASA when he disappeared into one. It seems after 13 years, the rifts have begun again and now aliens are coming through. Daddy’s assistant was the geeky Hans. He helps Flash and Dale with the investigation, it’s possible Flash’s dad is still alive.

Flash and Dale get sucked into a rift, while following a robot sent by Ming to find the “imex.” They learn Ming is after this Imex. A slave girl helps them escape, she of course is no slave, but Alora, Ming’s daughter. She takes a liking to Flash.

They return to Earth. Flash learns the imex is really his dad’s old watch, a Timex. Alora is trying to steal it to prove herself to Ming that she’s not just a nobody. She of course fails, Flash keeps it. Alora returns home and faces her father. Flash however has the “imex,” which inside is a chip containing “all the knowledge of the universe.” He’s determined to return to Mongo to find his long lost father.

His dad is trapped on Mongo, attached to machines probably taping his brain for his knowledge. We get the sense that Mongo is a dying planet, they have no clean water left. Basically it seems the planet has polluted itself beyond repair and they are hoping to find salvation in Earth.

Let’s be frank off the bat, this is not Grandma’s Flash Gordon (my Grandma grew up with the radio serial). This is and always has been promoted as a reinvention of a classic. I can’t fault them for trying something new. After all, the story of Flash Gordon is one most know by now, either from comics, the old movies, the 80s movie, or the cartoons made over the years. However I can fault them on a few things.

First the good. The casting of Flash and Dale wasn’t terrible. They also at least stayed true to a lot of the characters.

The middle of the road. Obviously rocket ship aren’t exactly cutting edge. Flash traveled to Mongo in one, the story was written before there were space ships. To bring it up to date, they replaced rocket ships with a time rift/portal. The main problem I had with this was that it was too much like Stargate, another show they already have. Basically I felt like I was watching Stargate: Flash Gordon.

The bad. The tops of the bad would be the destruction of Ming all together. Basically we’ve got a blond haired blue eyed Aryan dressed in an outfit from “The Wall.” We get it, he’s a Nazi like tyrant. This Ming just doesn’t work at all. They should have stayed true to the old Ming, even if he was cheesy and out dated. This was the worst part of the whole movie for me. I also didn’t like what happened to Hans’ character. He was always the kooky scientist, but now they’ve made him an anti-social geek.

Will I watch next week? Yes. Only to see what happens and if it actually gets better.

This Friday, August 10th on Sci-Fi is “Flash Gordon.” I’m going to be covering this, and hoping it doesn’t turn out to be a dud like a few other cable shows this summer *cough “Meadowlands”* *cough “John in Cincinnati”*.

Next Monday, the 13th, Season 3 of “Weeds” starts!

Photo Property of SciFi.com

So I just saw a really quick “teaser” on Sci Fi for the new “Flash Gordon” series coming in August. They really didn’t show anything but the title on a red sky with “Coming in August.” However what made me so happy was the fact that they have the Queen song in the promo! I’m hoping this means it will also be used as the intro song for the show itself. I am unsure though whether it’s the original Queen recording or a cover.

Just for nostalgia’s sake, and those of you old enough to remember, I’m throwing the old Queen video in.